He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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