yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
