I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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