He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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