Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
