This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize