U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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