If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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