someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize