On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
