Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
