How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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