i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I think my moral compass just broke
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