when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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