Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
