I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
