I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
