How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
