So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
