Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
