do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Randomize
