We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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