i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
im holly from the hills drunk
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
