Those balls look pretty dangerous.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
