oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
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I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
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Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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