Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
