question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
