I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
