i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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