I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
