MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
