Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize