dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
