I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Randomize