part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
