Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
