Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
