Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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