yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
