Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I need water and some morals
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
