Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?