Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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