I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
