I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
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