I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Randomize
