i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
True strength comes from lack of pants
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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