I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
