Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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