i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
