she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
