We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
